Month: October 2022

On October 16, 2022, Dad was told that he had a chance to have lunch with his daughters. He was excited to have any time with his daughters. Dad drove two hours to get to their place. He picked them up at 1:00PM. They all went to Olive Garden for lunch. Dad had collected some great video and pictures of both the daughters. He wanted to make them realize how great they were in sports. After ordering the food, Dad showed them how well the elder one swam, how well she trained, how well she ran. Dad showed the little one her swimming, her gymnastics and her winnings. Dad had sincerely hoped that they would look at those video and pictures and perhaps have a desire to get back into sports and if not sports, they would earnestly start working towards their fitness.

After the conclusion of the lunch, the elder daughter wanted to drive the car. She had got her learner’s permit last week. Dad went to Walmart and tried to make a sign that said student driver. One sign was placed at front and another at the back of the car. The elder one drive the car on the public roads for the first time. She navigated through the lights well. Dad was proud of her.

The little one also wanted to drive. However, the elder one asked to be dropped back to the house as she had some homework to finish. As the elder left, the little one changed her mind and went back to the house behind her sister. Dad asked for hugs and none came. Dad left them at about 4:30PM.

This was a good improvement over the last meetings. This meeting lasted for 3.5 hours. Dad is hopeful that the girls will come with him to his house for a weekend next time. Dad will never give up.

On Sept 30, 2022 Dad met with his two daughters and his Ex at Starbucks. The meeting lasted about 20 minutes. Dad drove about two hours to meet them. As he entered Starbucks, they were sitting at far left corner of the store. Four of them had not been together since June of 2020. Dad greeted them with enthusiasm and excitement and asked for a hug from the daughters. He was refused a hug by both the daughters. Dad sat down and waited for the things to unfold.

The daughters were told to state their grievances by their mom. Dad listened to their grievances patiently and quietly.

First grievance was that Dad’s girlfriend is annoying. Another grievance was that girlfriend should interject herself in a conversation between dad and daughter. Third grievance was the little one felt uncomfortable when she was offered ice-cream by girlfriend’s mom because she is allergic to nuts and egg and she felt unsafe. Fourth grievance was that the little one was offered alcohol by the girlfriend.

There was no mention of how great of a time they had at the lake during the father day weekend. There was no mention of the great food, company and hikes during the trip. There was no consideration of the possibility of a misunderstanding in all this.

As is done in a divorce case, attorneys are brilliant in assigning the worst possible meanings to the other person, Dad felt a cold chill in his spine as he realized his daughters were being sucked into this litigation game.

The elder one was eager to leave Starbucks as she had plans for the evening. As she said her peace, she was ready to bolt. Dad asked for a hug as they prepared to leave. No hug came through. Dad waived them goodbye as they left the Starbucks.

Dad drove back for two hours to get back to his house. This was supposed to be Dad’s weekend. All Dad got was a 20-minute grievance meeting and a hope that the girls would come one day to his house and spend time with him for at least one weekend every 15 days. Dad is making sure he remains engaged and available in his daughters life no matter the circumstances. Dad has learnt that his daughters knowing that they are cared and loved and wanted by their dad can play a crucial role in their development. Dad remains hopeful for his daughters happiness, well being and future prospects.